Wednesday, December 9, 2009
I am going to Hong Kong this coming Sunday :):):)
First time there!
13th December 6:50am
till
17th December 11:45pm
Hehes:)
And another trip is Batam
19th December to 22nd December:):)
Meng Jie @ 5:08 AM
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Tuesday, December 8, 2009
Those were the days... ...
When I had a smooth face.
Which I never hesitate to cam whore with... ...
Those were the days... ...
I enjoyed participating in various activities... ...
And love the experiences
Meng Jie @ 7:22 AM
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Thursday, September 24, 2009
Well, this is my nephew.
He had celebrated his 1st birthday this June.
And his favourite word is 'Ah Yi' which means aunt in chinese.
Sure he knows how to get his love from.
All his aunt and grandaunt pampers him a lot.
Hahas.
A cheerful and playful boy he is.
Meng Jie @ 9:13 PM
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Wednesday, September 9, 2009
I'M SO PISSED OFF... ...
Meng Jie @ 1:42 AM
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Monday, September 7, 2009
I had asked myself this question umpteen times.
"Did I lost control of my thoughts and emotions?"
The answer is "I think I did :)."
Meng Jie @ 12:27 AM
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Saturday, August 29, 2009
I am recuperating from failure both mentally and physically.
What had been wasted and drained away, I will recover them.
Time is precise and merciless.
It snatches our youth and sent us to realise reality.
I am going to excel.
I am determined to succeed.
Although time might be insufficient but I am going to move on.
Currently, preparing for GCSE 'O' level exmaination is imperative.
As students, we are obligated to aspire to pass it.
This is reality and it is cruel.
I might had been deprived of something before, but I have to forget it.
Let bygones be bygones
Meng Jie @ 10:57 AM
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Friday, August 28, 2009
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Footprint ain't the only thing that can represent memories.If I chose to be what I was which means that I would not be what I am.
The past is bygone and it shall be bygone.
I was what I am but not what I was.
I am not what I was but what I am.
This could be understood easily.
Just reminiscing about the lively memories..jpg)
Please God, send an angel of wisdom upon me.
It shall guide me and never forsake me. 
If we were fated to meet again in future, we will meet.
Friends are important in life.
But fate decides whether they are become our acquaintance or buddy.
Meng Jie @ 11:32 AM
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Wednesday, August 26, 2009
I couldn't believe my eyes as I stared at my results.
It a C5 after 5 years of time and energy harvested on Co-Curricular Activities(CCA).
This is ironic, I felt so ashamed of myself as a member who is extremely enthusiastic in CCA.
Currently, I am devastated because of this incident.
However, as I ruminate about the cause, I realised the reason behind it.
I was a CCA hopper. In the year 2005 and 2006, I was an active member of The Boys' Brigade.
And because I was not satisfied that I did not participate in Singapore Youth Festival Central Judging. In 2006, I decided to join the Philharmonic Chamber Choir after much persuasion from Rui De.
Hence, 3 out of 5 weekdays after school was spending time on CCA. I managed to juggle my time between academic and aesthetics. But things did not end as it seemed. I was told that our choir was under the minimum critera to even participate in the SYF 2007.
Subsequently, I commenced my search for another CCA. To my surprise, in July 2006, my school Guzheng Ensemble was hunting for males to participate in SYF 2007 for the percussion section. I was in hysterics. Well, another suprise was that I am the only male participant in the whole ensemble. In addition, I did not had any background in playing percussion. Thus, the beginning was quite difficult to manage. Furthermore, with the guidance of ensemble leader, Si Min, as well as other seniors making me felt a sense of belonging. Eventually, I stayed in Guzheng and picked up the techniques quickly.
Soon, my studies was affected by active involvement in CCA. I would tend to fell asleep frequently and became short tempered. I was so engrossed in CCA, I did not even studied for my Final term examination in Secondary 2. Hence, I merely just passed all my subjects and was then streamed into tail-end class in Sec 3. I was not emotional down at all as my attention was on CCA.
When 2007 arrived, Tanglin announced their next major musical production, A Chorus line, a Broadway Musical which was famous even till now. I branched out my interest by attending the audition. I was chosen because I was in choir to be in the main cast. Actually, there are over 16 main characters in the musical. But I had quite a major role. I had a solo monologue for approximately 7 minutes. It is not the end, in my role, he is a homosexual and had a extremely complicated past. Now I think you understand what is really tough about it... ... My main CCA, The Boys' Brigade, my attendance was badly affected as the cast has to start practices from February.
The experience in A Chorus line was immensely horrendous. In term 3, preparation for the preview show in November was 5 days per week, excluding Sunday. Sometimes, I was dreaded to even attend The Boys' Brigade. We had learnt dance moves such as classical ballet, jazz, retro and dance moves in the 1960s. Another aspect was vocals, almost each had a solo song, mine was a short one. Finally, we had to act as grown-up which were at least 10 years older than what we was. However, the characters in he story reminisce back to their distinct and common adolescent experience. To sum up, it was a memorable experience.
Turning back, SYF 2007 was in April at Singapore Conference Hall. The exact date was 24th April at around 11am. I could recall it because we clinched the Gold award. But nothing is fairytale, we went through a dispute before we became strong as a team. It was in March, 26th March on a Monday, if I am not wrong. We had regular practice which was not interesting as we had to practice only 2 pieces for SYF. But that afternoon, I accidentally accused Jia Qi of being jealous towards Qiu Han as Qiu Han was more talented musically than Jia Qi. We started arguing over my way of jesting her. The whole afternoon ended up with disharmony and in he midst of disband.
I was in jittery. I reprimanded myself for being naive and insensitive without much thought of the consequences of my deed. The next few days, some seniors sobbed over the issue. Everyone was pessimistic about it. However, her temper ceased and through her identical twin sister, I was given the opportunity to apologies to her. While everyone was around in the AVA room, we decided to be determined as a group to achieve Gold award for Tanglin Guzheng ensemble.
And we did!
After reading through, I am affirmed that you had realized how dramatic my Sec 3 lifestyle was that year. Moreover, in class, I had informally acquired the title 'late king'. Every week, without fail, would attain 3 slips of 'pink' forms. The worst of all was reaching school after recess period.
My academic results plunged to six 'F9' out of nine subjects without any pass beyond merit. Consequently, I was selected to retake Final term examinations for 4 subjects including English Language. But I was determined to retain in Sec 3 Express stream. Furthermore, I decided to retain in Sec 3 is due to the fact that I could not manage all the topics learnt in Sec 3 in such a short period of time. I never condemn myself for making this choice.
Instead, I was immensely delighted to be posted to 3E4 2008. Well, I never knew I could enjoy so much fun with them until I was included into their clicks. They just gave me the most wonderful experience as a class in my sec school journey. First sec school class outing was with them, overnight in town as a class and playing mahjong as a class. Sweet memories that were worthwhile time spent. But things did change as conflicts within clicks escalated. I shall not further elaborate or illustrate.
Alright, to much digression from me, back to main topic.
Well, I was committed to my class till I realized that I neglected BB. This was another year that contributed to my C5 grade. I would be reluctant to attend parades and events. I would always think of an excuse to escape or deliberately overslept. The minimum requirement for A1 is 25 and full marks is 62 marks. However, I only have 15 marks. 5 marks was from Community Involvement Programme(categorized as Service in L.E.A.P.S. system), 3 marks was from Character Development Programme (categorized as Enrichment under L.E.A.P.S.) and I can't recall were the 7 marks was from.
My achievements and participation in BB was annulled as my total attendance percentage was below minimum requirement of 75%. And the comments was my actual attendance was less then 50%. It was atrocious! I couldn't believe the images transmitter by my photoreceptors was ruthless and merciless. I had so much involvements and the attendance instantly took my breathe. My arterioles constricted and my temper escalated into hatred. Even though I knew about the results a month ago, I was still unsatisfied.
In conclusion, my remarks would be, CCA is a waste of time. Too realistic, immensely merciless.
Meng Jie @ 1:07 AM
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Sunday, August 23, 2009
Almost every moment I stepped on the path which I had once been.
The sense of downcast fell upon me, like a storm.
Full of hatred, full of emotions.
When can I forget and let it go?
Times of memory, times of regret.
I can't understand which was the regret which was willingness.
What for I care so much about the truth within.
When everything does not benefit me anymore.
I am beginning to be pessimistic and more introvert.
Life is just reality, Lifestyle are just dreams.
When will I learn, when will I acknowledge the truth.
Which I couldn't bear to even listen.
Extricate me from this desire to fade away.
Meng Jie @ 3:47 AM
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Saturday, August 22, 2009
What am I thinking, What am I doing?
How do I solve this complicated algebra equations in my mind.
I do not have the foundation and basic knowledge to solve them.
I just want to avoid them but they will never disappear.
It was like Deja-vu, from a normal Secondary 3 to retained secondary 3 student.
Everything will still return and need to be solved.
I am stress, confused and exhausted.
But who was really there for me.
But who was honest enough to be truthful.
I doubt so because life is filled with unsolvable quadratic equations.
Meng Jie @ 11:25 AM
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This week was an intense week for Sec.4 Exp students.
'O' level EL Oral Exam.
I am stressed up, why is EL difficult.
Recently, life was not smooth going for me.
I don't feel like writing more about it.
Life is an irony, irony is the unexpected.
Life is messy, I can't accept it yet.
Next Mon afternoon is my EL oral exam.
Yet I am still using the computer.
So stupid... ...
I love computer but life don't love me.
Why is education such a competitive sport.
We had to sweat till we bleed mentally and that is how torturing life is... ...
That's why humans becomes more and more selfish because the modern lifestyle is too
horrendous and helping others is not an ideal choice when you are already landed in a problem.
Meng Jie @ 9:40 AM
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Everything was planned.
You ran the programme with the help of friends.
I was the target, you was the sharpshooter.
Everything went as planned.
You won, I must highlight, you won.
I was speechless, emotionless and helpless.
You laughed, cheered and celebrated.
I became the dead man and left to rot.
Meng Jie @ 12:25 AM
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Thursday, August 20, 2009
WHO ARE YOU?
I can't believe what I had realised through my thoughts, that everything were lies.
How truthful can you be when everything was just a cover up.
Stop cursing me from your spells because I am tired already.
I was glad I pulled myself out of the situation I never deserved.
I shouldn't had been given such an ending.
You messed up my life, confused my thoughts.
Who are you?
Your mouth was the poison, my mind was corroded.
The memories were dreams, the end was reality.
Problems escalated, energy depletes.
Sacrificed made, but back with no appeciation.
Numbed by the treatment, blind by the impression.
Over trusted, over cheated.
Who are you?
I did not have any pillar of strength around me.
But you choose to drag me down.
Selfish, Self-centered and Self.
Never changing character, death of growth.
Inner conflict arised, who was there for me?
Not till I seek for refuge and there it was for me.
I took the courage to bid farewell, to what is never meant to be mine.
Who are you?
My conlusions made me a fool.
Choosing the pathway of rough terrain created by you.
How nice can you be, if everything was just to benefit you?
Why were you the actor and director, controlling everything.
Life is a irony, irony is the unexpected.
My remaining strength was too weak to keep me going on.
Who are you?
Time wasted, Time ran.
Energy invested, thoughts infested.
Acceptance, Rejection.
Close one eye, Open new lies.
I need a clear cut circuit between us.
Who are you?
I never knew who you really was until I ruminate through my thoughts.
I was too exhausted to even carry on.
As reality came closer, the cover was breaking.
I saw through you., but I am still befuddled.
I did not deserved to be given that.
I did not understand, I never knew.
Till the day I found my pillar of strength.
I realised I could had been my own pillar of knowledge.
Who are you?
Your eyes were opaque, but my heart was plastic.
Till I realised the truth.
Yours eyes became plastic and my heart was a 1mm think glass.
I thought I would break down, but the verge of anger took raced and won.
My trail of thought then became not negligible.
There was no halt to it, it never ends.
I discover new clues, I became the detective.
I realised the truth and research, I became the scientist.
I became everything that I wasn't.
But... ...
Who are you?
It was a road with a no detour sign, but there was no split road.
I shook my hand off and moved on.
I became a changed man, a tired man.
No one else was really there for me except my pillar of strength.
The road through was cruel and cold.
But it was not avoidable.
2am is the trend, no appeatie is the habit.
Who are you?
Meng Jie @ 9:21 AM
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Saturday, August 8, 2009
Meng Jie @ 11:22 PM
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Friday, August 7, 2009
CCA CCA... ... Thinking about it gives me total headache.
This afternoon had treat from Miss Chai.
Thanks a lot.
She treated this year graduating Sec 4s.
Then went to Jurong Point with Shermond,Rayney and Elton.
Found that JP is just a boring place.
Went home and here I am using the computer... ...
Today's NDP celebration was short and sweet.
Simple and not really enjoyable as expected.
Anyway, the rest is going to be random.
Life is full of unexpected and the word would be irony.
Next, Abigail asked me whether I still miss Guzheng.
Not really, I need to focus on my academic studies rather than
spending time missing Guzheng.
What I had wanted to achieved was achieved.
To participate in SYF.
Bored... ...
Don't feel like blogging anymore.
ByeBye
Sadness drowning me everyday
Meng Jie @ 6:49 AM
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